Burnout Isn’t a Mindset Problem — It’s a System Failure

In a previous post, I talked about “when being good is great enough.” But let’s call a spade a spade: Sometimes, even when you're doing your best to manage expectations and protect your peace, the pressure-cooker explodes. And when it does? You’re left standing in the wreckage of full-blown burnout.

I'm not telling you what I think. I'm telling you what I know.

I’ve worked myself into the ground in some seasons of my career — so much so that exhaustion doesn't even scratch the surface. I’m talking mental, physical, and emotional depletion. The kind that no weekend off, no long nap, and no Starbucks run could fix.

And guess what? No one at my job really cared.

Now, before you misinterpret that — I had (and still have) strong personal relationships with four of my last five direct supervisors (The one outlier? We quickly realized we were a terrible match, and I initiated and negotiated my own exit — a story for another time.) Three of those four former supervisors are even coming to my wedding this year. So no, this isn’t a “bad boss” story.

This is a business reality check:

• Business needs > Your burnout.

• Company priorities > Your personal peace.

Even with good bosses. Even with strong relationships. Even with all the "we care about you" Slack messages. When push comes to shove, the bottom line comes first — and you’re expected to keep performing, regardless of what it's costing you behind the scenes.

Where did that leave me? Stuck.

Sitting somewhere between complete exhaustion and crushing pressure to "snap out of it" and "get back to being a high performer."

And what comes next? Cue every tired internet coach talking about mindset shifts:

• “Just stay positive!”

• “Say your affirmations!”

• “Visualize your success!”

Now listen — I love affirmations. I’m all for gratitude journals, meditation, and yoga. I practice them all religiously.
But let's be real… Changing me doesn't change the external forces that drove me into the ground to begin with.

Sure, self-care helps me get into a better mental space...But then what?

I take my newly fragile, carefully rebuilt peace of mind and toss it right back into the corporate machine — like throwing it into a Ninja blender on max speed — and expect different results?

Does that sound as crazy to you as it does to me?

Because when you actually put this common cycle into words, it sounds completely unhinged. Yet so many of us are trapped in it.

The truth?

Self-care is powerful — but don’t let it become the tool that convinces you to stay somewhere that’s crushing you.

You are not broken for being burned out. You are human.

You deserve to protect your peace — not just patch it up for another spin in the blender.

Self-care is essential.But it is not — and never will be — a full solution if the system around you remains toxic, unsustainable, or misaligned.

Here's what actually helped me break the cycle — and protect my peace:

(Real tools. Not just “good vibes.”)

➡️ Create a personal capacity plan: Prioritize your work ruthlessly. Not everything that’s urgent is important. Protect your energy like your life depends on it — because it does.

➡️ Establish “red lines:” Know what you will and will not tolerate — and stick to it. These aren’t negotiable. They’re survival rules.

➡️ Push for structural conversations: Bring receipts, not just emotions. Track your workload, show the gaps, and present solutions. Data demands attention.

➡️ Document your wins: Burnout messes with your memory. Keep a list of everything you're accomplishing so you can stay grounded in reality, not self-doubt.

➡️ Normalize having an exit strategy: You don't have to stay loyal to a company that's slowly draining you. Sometimes the most professional move you can make is to leave.

➡️ Get real support: Therapy, coaching, a true mentor — not just a co-worker to vent to. You need strategy and emotional support.

➡️ Reject the “hustle = loyalty” myth: Your value is not tied to how much you sacrifice. Deliver your best work when you are well — not when you are bleeding out.

And since y’all still want the vibes — here’s your list:

(Because yes, you still deserve to feel good, even if your environment is trash.)

 🧘🏽‍♀️ Meditation
📓 Journaling
🙏🏽 Gratitude lists
📚 Reading non-work-related books
🏋🏽‍♀️ Strength training or yoga
🎧 Curating an affirmations playlist
✈️ Planning a "nothing but vibes" solo trip
👩🏽‍🍳 Cooking meals that nourish you
🎨 Tapping into creativity (painting, writing, building)
🧖🏽‍♀️ Scheduling massages without guilt
🚶🏽‍♀️ Walking outside without your phone glued to your hand
🎶 Dancing to your “delulu main character” playlist in your living room
🔥 Cutting off energy vampires (yes, even the well-meaning ones)

All of this helps. But none of it should distract you from also asking harder questions about your environment, your workload, and your boundaries.

Bottom line:

Self-care is critical. But system care is survival. You deserve to build a life where you aren’t constantly recovering from your job.